“What do you do?” Often, this is the first question we ask on meeting a new person. We are usually defined by what we do. “She’s a doctor”, “He’s a teacher”, “I’m a healer”.
When the author Howard Cutler asked the Dalai Lama to describe his work, he replied, “Nothing. I do nothing”. When Cutler pressed harder, the Dalai Lama simply said “I just look after myself”. He is very clear: The purpose of life is to be happy. But happiness isn’t something we do – it is something we are. In the West, this is counter-cultural. Most of us believe that in order to be happy, there is something we must have and thus something we must do. For example, in order to be content, I must have a bigger house which means I must do my job.
But notice that what we’re really after is a feeling. Given that we desire a state of being, there is a more direct route. Instead of trying to reach this by doing and having, we could start with the being itself. This means that you decide to be happy first. Or generous or empowered or wild or peaceful or whatever. So, before going for a job interview, you make a conscious choice to be happy about the opportunity, regardless of the outcome.
This calls for a certain detachment from results. How can you appreciate the interview when you don’t get the job? You can “see the perfection” even when it is not immediately obvious. Even when you “fail” the interview, you don’t get the promotion, experience the healing, or meet the man of your dreams… you don’t lose heart.
You can choose to be happy in any of these situations, because happiness has ZERO to do with exterior circumstances. And once you realise this, you have great peace.
In a nutshell
“Need nothing. Desire everything. Choose what shows up.” (CWG)
Applying this wisdom
1. Think of something you really want: a new kitchen, a more fulfilling relationship, a better sex life. Write this down.
2. Ask yourself: Why do I want this? What do I think it will bring me? Get to the feeling: a sense of contentment, excitement, fulfilment or security. Write this down.
3. Go inside and find this feeling within. Let this feeling flood your body. Enjoy!
4. Now ask yourself, if I were to start from this feeling, what would I do?
5 comments
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24 November 2006 at 4:51 pm
Tia
Hi Sarah, I really enjoyed this post. It makes me feel hopeful to know that there is someone out there practising the principle of being, which I find so hard to do. How can you help me to be more consistent about this?
27 November 2006 at 6:04 pm
Sarah
Hi Tia,
Being is not something we have to try hard to…be! We are always being something. From your comment you sound as though you are being keen, enthusiastic, optimistic. To keep going, I suggest that you get really clear about which quality of beingness you are intending to experience (e.g. joyful). At least once a day ask yourself: How can I be more joyful? If you are a long way from experiencing joy, ask yourself: What will help me to feel a little more joy? Making small shifts emotionally can have a big impact and will help you to be more consistent. Good luck! Sarah
8 February 2007 at 10:19 am
franspie
Hi Sarah
As a new member of WordPress, I just had to look you up! I love your blog – it looks so beautiful! Been reading the above which I love the ideas behind, and thought I’d try the process you describe to apply the wisdom, as its so timely for me:
1. What do I want?:
My reality right now is that I want the job I had an interview for yesterday!
2. Why? What would it bring me? :
Primarily, there’s the reality that I do actually ‘need’ the job, from a financial POV. Boring but true…
Why this job? It ticks my boxes in terms of the role, the purpose, the challenge, the environment and location, the team-work, the kudos.
I have just realised I am not getting to the feeling.
Here goes:
calmness (financially);
stimulation (the role);
contentment (at being part of a business);
enjoyment (people I meet/work with, grow to know as colleagues/friends;
excitement (newness of it, change, the starting a fresh in my new local area, the physical environment of the organisation);
proud (that I had a dream to move house and find work locally – that I made tough decisions in order to enable that to happen).
3. Finding this feeling within: can you help me here?
….I can find stimulation in my life from she-time and (as you describe in another post) looking after myself (and husband and loved ones), but its a different stimulation – I am challenged in different ways to those in the job.
I can find enjoyment – I can see that… I can inject enjoyment into the things I do. Is this what you meant?
What do I do about find finding calmness financially?
Am I getting this, or way off the mark…?
4. If I start from this point what would I do?:
Would I be able to more easily accept that it may not happen, let it go? Can I feel financially calm, proud of myself, stimulated, contentment, enjoyment without the act of getting the job…
Not sure if I have quite got to the essence of this, and could do with some help if you can.
Thank you.
Much love, Fran
13 February 2007 at 5:19 pm
Sarah
Hi Fran,
You sound well on your way to finding work that will fulfill all aspects of your being! The nut to crack in you current situation seems to finding a state of calmness around your financial well-being.
Let me ask you: What or who do you think is the source of your abundance? If you think this is an organisation, clients or your own hard graft no wonder calmness can feel a long way off.
Could you consider the possibility that the Universe itself is the real source of your prosperity? If you did, what difference might this make?
I know that when I remind myself that there’s something Much Bigger going on here, even when I go for job interviews, I can relax and let go of the outcome.
I suggest using some affirmations daily to generate a sense of peace as you look for work. For example:
-> I am open to receiving the superabundance of the Universe
- > I am becoming more and more prosperous
- > I let go of any thoughts or feelings that block my good coming to me.
I’d also recommend reading “Effortless Prosperity” by Bijan (former Mr Universe)
Good luck!
Sarah
15 February 2007 at 4:29 pm
franspie
Hi Sarah
Thank you for your response to my comment/post. It made a lot of sense to me, and I can see that the affirmations will help me get out of a sense of panic over income. I took them with to my Pilates class the other night!!
I struggle with marrying the things I believe in which are more spiritual with the daily practicalities of life.
In other words, I seek to understand ‘how’ it can be that I can become more and more prosperous or receive the Universe’s superabundance without the things you mention. You’re right in your observation that to me the source (oops typed sauce first!) of my abundance exists in organisations, clients and by working. I would question whether this is not in fact a truth / reality….
I have an abundance of love in my life, and I do understand that in order to get that I had to first get to the stage of, yep you guessed it, loving myself.
Once I did that, there was no stopping the changes that occurred and the love that arrived over the years. Although I didn’t know that when I embarked on a journey of loving myself – this came after a huge wake-up call that my life wasn’t working and I was so unhappy at being rejected or not enough for someone else once again.
I can see the logic in how this applies to the area of love:
Because I loved myself and looked after myself first and foremost, I made myself more open to love, a more loving person with more to give; I was more focused and centred, and in turn more ‘loveable’.
Yet how does one equate that to the area of money…?
Applying the above logic on how I generated more love in my life to how I might generate income, how is this?: (I am thinking this as I type it so have no idea what is going to come out here)
If I feel financially secure and look after all my finances with care and attention, I make myself more open to income; I would then feel I had money to give or would be open to opportunities, perhaps investment opportunities; I would feel secure, generous, opportunistic, and in turn would become more attractive to money (!!).
Does this work for you?
Of course, the obstacle here is that feeling financially secure is hard to ‘feel’ when you are not financially secure. Is this where you have to take that huge leap of faith??? I would really appreciate you’re advise on this.
BTW, it seems to be pointing me towards a sideways glance at freeing up any money I can and investing it in something new.
Hmmm.
All food for thought.
Fran x