The purpose of life is joy

What is the purpose of life? This is a BIG question! I believe that life has no inherent purpose for if it did this would take away our freedom and ability to choose. I propose that life is intrinsically purposeless so that each one of us is able to imbue it with a purpose of our own. And in so doing we announce and become, create and define, express and experience Who We Really Are. This means that, in short, the purpose of life is to create and experience Who We Really Are.

This game is never over. For as soon as we experience ourselves in our fullest glory, we will in that same moment imagine an ever greater glory to fulfil. As soon as we reach the top of one mountain, we see another peak to scale up and another valley to cross.

Notice how children naturally strive to be more themselves. Once a baby can sit up, she has an impulse to try to stand, and once she can stand, at some point she wants to try to put one foot in front of another. And the delight when she finds that she is actually able to walk! It is a moment of pure glory. I believe that this being more of who we are is our joy and our birthright.

As adults it seems much harder for us to reach out for the next grandest experience of ourselves. Have you ever wanted to leave the job or walk out of the relationship and stopped short? Would it make any difference if you believed that the purpose of life is to be joyful? That you have a right to be happy?

I am not suggesting that the way to peace is to be smiley, happy people all the time. This isn’t realistic. But I do believe that we can be in our joy in each moment whatever emotional state we are experiencing. Like a tree sinking its roots deep into the earth and drawing up moisture from the soil, we can draw joy into ourselves even when everything around us seems to be falling apart.

Joy is a choice. We can choose to en-joy something, which is to say we can decide to place joy there. And the quickest way to do this? Release the joy inside another. Whether it’s giving another a smile, a heartfelt compliment, passing them a tissue or making them a cup of tea. In the moment you decide to do this, you will know how.

In a nutshell 

The purpose of life is to experience the fullest glory

Applying this wisdom
 
1.  What brings you joy?

2.  How can you bring more of this into your life?

3.  How do you feel when you experience yourself at your very best?

4.  How can you move closer to feeling this right here right now?

Everything is co-created

I want to explore the idea that we are each creating the world around us and within us all the time. You may not agree with this, particularly if you do not like what is showing up in your reality. But taking this perspective is actually immeasurably empowering because it enables you to change your experience of the world rather than feel at the mercy of whatever is happening. Let me explain.
 
We create our reality with our thoughts, words and actions. What we think of, speak and act on shows up in our life. The trick is to use these tools consciously so that we maximise the likelihood that what we want will come into our space.
 
Often however we get surprised by what happens. For example, I get made redundant and think “How did that happen?” But if I look back, I can see that I was fantasising about having a different job and complaining about my boss to my friends. My thoughts and words were creating my reality it’s just that I wasn’t aware of it. Accepting the part I played in what manifests is a big step on the road to inner peace.
 
The next step is to learn to use the creative process consciously. To do this, decide in advance what you want in relation to your job, relationship, health or whatever and then align what you think, say and do with this. You want a new relationship? Visualise meeting your ideal partner, speak about it to your friends and take some action such as sprucing up your wardrobe.
 
Not everything is controllable in this way. The creative process works collectively as well as an individually. World events, such as the tsunami and 9-11, are often written off as “fate” yet CWG suggests this is can be an acronym for “from all thoughts everywhere”. In other words, they are the result of the consciousness of the planet.

Take what happened during the Holocaust. Who was responsible? It’s easy for us to demonise Hitler but there were many collaborators including the Nazi interrogators, the state officials in other countries who did not intervene and others who simply ignored what was happening. As CWG says, the real tradegy was not only that Hitler came along but that so many others went along. Without this group consciousness Hitler would not been able to seize the moment in the way he did.  

I believe that we could use the power of the collective to create huge positive change. If enough people across the globe believe something must be done to help the environment and we all put thought into action, we can save the planet. We may even one day create heaven on earth for all beings everywhere. 

In a nutshell 

“There are no victims and villains”
 
Applying this wisdom 
 
1. Think of something you really desire e.g. a new partner, job or state of well-being
 
2. Do something that will help to bring this to you even if it is something small e.g. get your hair cut, go for a walk
 
3. Notice how taking this action makes you feel better. Let yourself really notice and enjoy this feeling.
 
4. From this feeling place, think a new thought and speak a new word about what you want. Focus on these as much as possible.

Move beyond right and wrong

We human beings love to think in terms of right and wrong. Take religion. Whether it’s the ten commandments of Christianity, the yamas of the Hindu scriptures or the Noble Eightfold path of Buddhism, each of these moral codes would tend to be seen by their adherents as unchangeable and universal. Yet how can this be when these models of morality differ across religions. If as a Christian I can eat pork but as a Jew I can’t, it raises the question who is creating the morals? We are.

Notice that ideas about right and wrong have changed over time within a single religion. For instance, the Anglican Church thought for hundreds of years that it was wrong for a woman to become a minister whereas now she can become a bishop. The point is that even religious ideas about right and wrong (which are deemed to have the authority of God behind them) are what Hemingway would call a “moveable feast”.

Secular morality also varies from place to place. If I am in the Netherlands, I can legally earn my living as a prostitute but in New Jersey I can’t. As a gay man in South Africa I can now marry my same-sex partner whereas in Kenya I could get up to 14 years’ imprisonment (although interestingly not if I was a practising lesbian). Who then is “right”? The South Africans or the Kenyans? Is it “right” to have gay sex at all?

What I am trying to demonstrate is that our ideas about right and wrong are simply that, ideas. We’ve made them all up. And there is nothing wrong with this! In fact, it is by defining some things as right (e.g. speaking the truth) and other things as wrong (e.g. stealing) that we define who we are and keep the structure of society in place.

But we forget that what we see as right is usually what we agree with rather than an absolute standard. And we love being right! It can be helpful therefore to move beyond thinking in terms of right and wrong. CWG suggest a new model: What works and what doesn’t work, given what it is we are trying to be, have and do.

So, the question “Is is wrong to smoke?” becomes “Is is appropriate for me to have a cigarette given that I want to live a long healthy life?” Or, “Is it wrong for us to invade that country?” could become “Will it create the greatest good for the greatest number if we invade that country?” (if indeed that is what we are trying to do).

I believe that asking questions in this way could help us to resolve some of the moral dilemmas that life presents us with and that with this could come great peace.

In a nutshell 

“There’s no such thing as right and wrong” (CWG) 

Applying this wisdom 

1. Identify a behaviour that you have a strong moral judgement about i.e. you believe that people should be punished for acting in that way (e.g. killing)

2. Ask yourself: Are there any circumstances under which that behaviour would not be “wrong”? (e.g. killing an intruder who is kidnapping a child)

3. Replace the statement about that thing being wrong with a statement about it being inappropriate given what it is that person is trying to be, do or have

4. Notice any change in how you feel as a result. Remember this feeling next time you “should” or “shouldn’t” on someone – including yourself! When this happens, take a step back, create a new observation and loosen up your thinking.

Visibility is the way forward

The times when I have looked someone in the whites of their eyes and really spoken my truth are moments I will never forget. Even if it was scary to do at the time, I felt completely exhilarated afterwards. As a result, stuck situations started to move again. I think this is what Jesus meant by: The truth shall set you free.

The way to a life of peace and happiness is to move from Hiding Out to Revealing All. The road to freedom lies in becoming more visible. The easiest way to start is by getting honest with yourself. This is the first of the 5 levels of truth telling.

Tell the truth to yourself about yourself. Even this can be hard! The quickest way to get to your truth is through your feelings. Look to how you are feeling. If it helps, write it down or speak it out loud. Remember this is your truth so don’t worry about what others think.

The next step is to tell the truth to yourself about another. This can be even tougher. It can bring up fears about breaking your promises or hurting another’s feelings. Just be honest with yourself and go gently.

Next, tell the truth to another about yourself. Be strong and of good courage. Be careful not to withhold important information. This doesn’t mean you have to share every thought, observation or past memory as this would drive you mad! But it is about making sure that everyone is playing with all the cards on the table. Total visibility means hiding nothing.

Then, tell the truth to the other about that other. You may feel afraid of hurting someone else’s feelings or that they leave the room. Telling the truth is sometimes uncomfortable. Remind yourself that it is more important how you send a message than how it is received.

Finally tell the truth to everyone about everything. Become a spiritual warrior and bring the sword of truth to bear in all situations. Can you imagine what our world would like if we shared all there was to know about everything? It would turn this world upside down. It would be revolutionary!

Ultimately I think that truth is who we are. Perhaps this is why we all seem to have a pretty reliable bullshit detector inside?

In a nutshell

“Honesty is the highest form of love” (CWG)

Applying this wisdom

1. Think of a time when you have been radically honest with yourself. How did this make you feel? Allow yourself to step into that feeling.

2. Bring that feeling to bear as you think of a current situation where you would like to be more honest with yourself. What would you say to yourself? Write this down.

3. Practise speaking your truth to the one in the mirror. How does this feel? If any uncomfortable feelings come up, notice them and watch them pass.

4. What would you now like to tell another based on what you have told yourself? Practise telling them out loud. Notice if you feel ready to do this for real or not.

Bless the opposite showing up

We live in a world of contrasts. Think of the seasons. We cannot have spring without winter or autumn without summer. It is the whole cycle that gives us the experience of the seasons in all their glory.

Similarly if “short” does not exist, I cannot know myself as “tall”. If there is no experience for me to call “sad”, I cannot know “happy”. This is sometimes called the Law of Opposites which refers to the necessity of two apparent opposites existing in the same space in order for either of them to exist at all.

So, put simply, in the world in which we live there is no “fast” without “slow”, no “joy” without “sorrow”, and no “good” without “evil”. Yet notice how these are not fixed categories. On a day when it’s 12 degrees centrigrade in a British summer people would call it “chilly” whereas in a British winter they would say it was “warm”. In other words, we are making it all up. Ultimately these things are objective phenomena which we label depending on the context or judgement we give them.

This is not to trivialise it. In fact, this labelling is an act of great importance. It is by declaring some things to be, for example, evil that we define ourselves. As it says in CWG, the biggest evil would be to declare nothing evil at all. For us to define who we are, we must select some things from the vast collective of phenomena and call them evil. Unless I do this, I cannot call myself or anything else good.

Now this principle of relativity applies in the physical world in which we live. Yet, in the spiritual world from which we come and to which we return, this is not the case. There, All That Is is All That Is. There is no relational principle at work simply because there is only One Thing and it is all magnificent. The image we are given for the spiritual realm in CWG is that of a little candle shining in the presence of the sun. The little candle knows that is it is light but it can’t really experience itself as light because Light is all there is. And so the little candle chooses to go to another realm in order to surround itself by darkness. By encountering the darkness or that which it is not the little candle is able to really know itself as that which it is.

I believe that appreciating this field of contrasts can lead to us experiencing a more harmonious life. For instance, you may choose to see yourself as a peaceful person and then find yourself encountering all sorts of aggression. Now instead of condemning it, what if you acknowledged that this aggression coming into your space actually enabled you to declare and express yourself as a woman or man of peace? By taking this perspective and blessing the experience, you may even be able to help to transform the aggression into something else.

In a nutshell

“In the absence of that which you are not, that which you are… is not” (CWG)

Applying this wisdom

1. Think of something you are intending to be more of (e.g. prosperous)

2. Identify what is coming into your space that is the opposite of this (e.g. being pick-pocketed)

3. What is the gift or the message that this experience of the opposite is bringing you?

4. Who do you choose to be in relation to this Other Than that is showing up?

There’s nothing you have to do

“What do you do?” Often, this is the first question we ask on meeting a new person. We are usually defined by what we do. “She’s a doctor”, “He’s a teacher”, “I’m a healer”.

When the author Howard Cutler asked the Dalai Lama to describe his work, he replied, “Nothing. I do nothing”. When Cutler pressed harder, the Dalai Lama simply said “I just look after myself”. He is very clear: The purpose of life is to be happy. But happiness isn’t something we do – it is something we are. In the West, this is counter-cultural. Most of us believe that in order to be happy, there is something we must have and thus something we must do. For example, in order to be content, I must have a bigger house which means I must do my job.

But notice that what we’re really after is a feeling. Given that we desire a state of being, there is a more direct route. Instead of trying to reach this by doing and having, we could start with the being itself. This means that you decide to be happy first. Or generous or empowered or wild or peaceful or whatever. So, before going for a job interview, you make a conscious choice to be happy about the opportunity, regardless of the outcome.

This calls for a certain detachment from results. How can you appreciate the interview when you don’t get the job? You can “see the perfection” even when it is not immediately obvious. Even when you “fail” the interview, you don’t get the promotion, experience the healing, or meet the man of your dreams… you don’t lose heart.

You can choose to be happy in any of these situations, because happiness has ZERO to do with exterior circumstances. And once you realise this, you have great peace.

In a nutshell

“Need nothing. Desire everything. Choose what shows up.” (CWG)

Applying this wisdom

1. Think of something you really want: a new kitchen, a more fulfilling relationship, a better sex life. Write this down.

2. Ask yourself: Why do I want this? What do I think it will bring me? Get to the feeling: a sense of contentment, excitement, fulfilment or security. Write this down.

3. Go inside and find this feeling within. Let this feeling flood your body. Enjoy!

4. Now ask yourself, if I were to start from this feeling, what would I do?